To all those who are Security Officers. Additional Training.

(a) It is now, and will be even more so in the future, the policies of any company to assure its Security Officers are well trained. Through our SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING program, (S.H.I.T for short. If any Security Officers feel that he does not receive enough S.H.I.T. on the job, or that he or she could advance to another position by taking more S.H.I.T. contact your supervisor/manager.

(b) If you graduate to the top of your list by taking all the S.H.I.T.that is given to you, you can then qualify for the Supervisors Program-COMPLETE RESPONSIBILITY ACTION PROGRAM (or C.R.A.P. for short)

So to become a member of a management team, simply take all the S.H.I.T. you can and then with all the additional C.R.A.P. you receive you will soon become one of the elite.

Any Security Officers who have the initiative and drive to take both S.H.I.T. and C.R.A.P. will soon reach the top.

(c) For a limited period only, all Security Officers have a chance to try for the latest scheme, ADVANCED SUPERVISORY STAFF HELPING OUR LOWLIFE EFFECTIVELY (or A.S.S.H.O.L.E. for sure).

So work hard, and you will find that the more S.H.I.T. you take and the more C.R.A.P. you can handle will qualify you as an A.S.S.H.O.L.E. for sure.