Ask stupid questions.
Braid your dogs hair.
Buff your cat.
Drop your cat from a high place, to see if it really does land on all four feet.
Get a dog to chase your car.
Give your cat a mohawk.
Give your cat a suntan...in the microwave.
Give your goldfish a perm.
Harness chipmunk power.
Let him catch it.
Prove once and for all that a cow can jump over the moon.
Raise professional racing ferrets.
Send your goldfish to obedience school.
Tree a goldfish.
Water your dog...see if he grows.